StFX Students AI Usage: How Are You Learning?

“I could just use Chat GPT for this”. 

In a world of integrated AI technology it can be hard, if not impossible, to meet a student who has never used artificial intelligence. Whether it is the AI overview on Google, or writing a paper due in 20 minutes, the ease of access of AI has made it an unavoidable resource and temptation. And for many, the choice is simple with a schedule of assignments and lectures, tests and labs, it would be silly to not save yourself the time and effort, right? Instead of adapting and pushing through with other provided resources for studying, students have turned to AI to lessen the load. However, this increase in AI usage raises the question: how and what are you learning? And how do your professors know that you are? 

Although the rise in students' AI usage is across all disciplines, concerns tend to be focused on Arts Degrees. In a class where students’ understanding of the material is often based on writing and assignments, AI is the easiest tool to cheat with. Not only is it integrated into most major grammar checkers, but any student can simply type an essay prompt into Chat GPT and have a full paper. Although your professor can check to see if your assignment feels “human made”, there’s no one way to tell for sure with AI’s rapid advancements.  

I sat down with Rachel Hurst, professor of Women’s and Gender Studies at StFX, to discuss her feelings on the use of AI in student work. Dr. Hurst brought a unique perspective as both a professor that grades her classes mostly through written assignments and participation, and as someone returning to teaching after a yearlong sabbatical. They stated that the most important value in a classroom to them is trust, and that AI has made it harder to uphold mutual trust between members of the class. How does a teacher trust that a student isn’t using Chat GPT to write or correct their work? How can students trust each other when grades could be based on AI- created work? 

At the same time, Dr. Hurst shared that she empathized deeply with the students who use AI as a shortcut. “Chat GPT scares me, because I can see how it would be easy to rely on it”.  They continued, “I’m sure there are some students who use it to write entire essays, but most probably use it as a way to package their ideas together”. After speaking casually throughout the week to other students and teachers about using AI, this idea was common. Students feel overworked and out of time, consequently working with AI as a time and stress saver, and a way to easily gather and write out thoughts. Tteachers, however, fear that AI limits key skills and comprehension of the information being taught.  

The solution that most professors lean towards to solve these problems is a change in how they assign work. Some, like Professor Hurst, have started creating in-class written assignments, with the work only being accessed by students during class hours. Others use AI checking websites and hope that they remain accurate. Though the rise in AI is only just beginning, the worry persists that more advanced uses will be developed, and in turn more complicated solutions created to combat them.  

Ultimately, whether a student chooses to use AI for their work is a personal decision, and there is only so much a school can do to stop it. A university is here to give you the tools and information you need to succeed in your education, but you decide what to do with those tools. I do, however, urge every student to consider their options before reaching for AI, and to ask themselves: “What am I learning from this? And how does it benefit me?”.  

AI Cheating and the Undergraduate Experience

The rise of students cheating using AI is having a disastrous effect at StFX and in the academic field by fundamentally changing the way people experience university education, the goal of which is to get good grades in order to get a good job.  Some students use AI to keep their academic workload light. To them, even if it is cheating, it's justified; they're doing what they need to do to succeed. I interviewed a business student who admitted to using AI to cheat. When asked if they believe cheating makes the class experience worse, they argued that using AI to summarize readings allows people to engage in conversations they wouldn’t otherwise participate in, which improves discussion. However, they also said that students should not be allowed to pass off AI writing as their own. “I feel like you should only be able to use it as a reference” they said, adding that “anything over 25% [written by] AI is quite bad, and not professional, not beneficial to you or the school … if its more than that, I’m gonna feel bad about it”. They later added that when it comes to writing, “authenticity is important”. 

Professors argue that AI is damaging to the university structure and that cheating restricts the development of key practical skills that students must develop. For Dr Steven Baldner, professor of philosophy, one of these important skills include “writing, being able to understand a problem independently, explain what the problem is and give a solution to the problem in a clear and coherent way”. The student I talked to argued that AI makes the university experience easier and described AI as “so beneficial … especially for time saving”. They also said that “sometimes the way professors explain things is so advanced because they're so advanced and AI can really dumb things down”. But they did not hesitate to say that cheaters should be punished: “If you're getting an assignment and 100% generating it with AI and handing it in, then you should be punished, that’s not how school works”.  

Professors argue that cheating erodes their relationship with students by affecting their ability to trust them. Dr Baldner believes that “if you forbid the use of AI and a student has done that, it’s a real rupture in our relationship, and I have had that experience already, sadly. Its upsetting”. It is not hard to imagine that a lack of trust inevitably strains the professor-student relationship because reliability comes from trust; if you don’t trust your students, then the way you treat them changes - and likely for the worst. When asked if good prof-student relationships improve the class environment, the student answered that it makes the experience “just incrementally better” but that AI should not be seen as a form of betrayal. “I would say it's kind of the opposite of a betrayal, I feel like a betrayal would be me listening to the prof, not understanding what he says, and also never trying to understand … but AI allows me to - if I don’t understand something, actually dive deeper into it and care about what the prof is saying”. These two views on AI are incompatibly different, yet it is not difficult to sympathize with both opinions. 

In our conversation, Dr Baldner mentioned that AI falls short as an academic tool because that’s not what it was designed to be: “I don’t think it's intelligence … it is just a very elaborate way of producing word association and I think for that reason it will never achieve what the human author can do”. AI can produce relevant answers with proper grammar but is not concerned with truth or argumentative quality. It is not hard to see how AI could be helpful; in our conversation, Dr Baldner said that AI “certainly has a lot of very helpful applications in a number of fields,” but was clear that he is concerned about AI use among undergraduates.  

Dr Baldner used an analogy of a tennis ball machine to explain his view on AI; these machines are used to practice, not to compete. Dr Baldner said, “The point is for you to learn how to hit…we don’t put the machines in the game”. ChatGPT might be able to show you how to use a semicolon or what a good use of the exclamation mark is, but it’s production cannot be passed off as the work of a student. This is because the student didn’t participate in the generation of the arguments, often the most important part of an essay. The school considers AI to be plagiarism, not just because it generates sentences that are not one’s own, but because they also do not belong to the AI model. An AI database is not created by the machine; it is fed to it. AI results come from compilations of human data, and a student who uses these results is plagiarizing work from that database.  

Cheating is dishonest, and this alone is often seen as bad in and of itself. But that is not where the problems stop; professors at StFX are compelled to implement preventative measures to stop cheating. These measures take different forms, such as not allowing technology in the classroom, or in-class exams replacing take-home essays. But these changes also negatively affect students by stopping them from learning how to do take-home assignments or prepare research papers. In addition, in-class essays disfavour certain students. Dr Baldner recognized this by mentioning that certain “students have anxiety in those quiz situations”. In-class essays also take away from lecture time, resulting in either rushed examinations to fit a lecture in afterwards or missing topics that should be included in the teaching of a subject. “You're actually cutting down the amount that you can accomplish”, as Dr Baldner told me. These consequences come from trying to prevent cheating, something that has to be done to retain classroom equality, but the preventative measures negatively impact certain students, which also disrupts classroom equality.  

The ‘real world’ and the careers we are preparing for at university are competitive and complex. To excel, you will need to be trained and prepared for them. When a university does not set students up for success, then a good transcript becomes the sole purpose of their education. Many see a university diploma as an expensive addition to a job resume, so why not make this addition as easy as possible? During our conversation, the student told me that if there was no risk of punishment for AI that they “would use it always”. Being able to do your future job well is not common sense; it has long been the role of universities to prepare students for this transition, but now it seems that AI can do this. The problem is that AI does not provide its users with an education, only the answering of prompts. The job of AI is not done alongside a user, but for them, cheating them of the opportunity to learn how to do tasks themselves moving forward. When preparing for the job field, it is either education or reliance on AI.  

More Than History: Understanding Treaty Day as a Living Commitment

On October 1st, 2025, the Sociology 329 class on Climate, Truth and Future held a presentation for Treaty Day at the Antigonish Public Library. Treaty Day in Nova Scotia is to recognize the Peace and Friendship Treaties signed in 1752.  

The presentation began with a land acknowledgement, recognizing that we are in Mi’Kma’ki, the ancestral and unceded territory of the Mi’kmaq people. Then, an explanation on what it is that Treaties truly means and why it’s important.  

The British Empire signed a series of treaties with various Mi’Kmaq, Wolastoqiyik, Abenaki, Penobscot, and Passamaquoddy peoples living in what is now known as the Maritimes,  the Gaspé region in Eastern Quebec and parts of New England. The treaty, signed by Jean Baptiste Cope, the Chief Sachem of the Mi’kmaq and Governor Peregrine Hopson of Nova Scotia, was intended to make peace and promised hunting, fishing, trading and land-use rights.  

The Peace and Friendship treaties are constitutionally protected by Section 35 of Canada’s Constitution Act, which recognizes and affirms existing Indigenous and treaty rights. These precedents mean that when governments or companies try to restrict or criminalize Indigenous hunting, fishing, land access or natural resource use, Indigenous groups can invoke the treaties as legal backing to challenge these actions.  

This is particularly significant, as highlighted during the presentation, because on September 23rd the province introduced the Protecting Nova Scotians Act. The bill promises to keep forest access roads open and allow the removal of any structures that threaten public safety or block lawful use of Crown lands, without prior notice. Mi’kmaq land defenders have been on Hunters Mountain, located in the Cape Breton Highlands, for a month with a checkpoint and a cedar line. They are not blocking the forest road or access to the mountain, as locals are welcome to visit the mountain. From their perspective it’s an act of self-governance to protect their lands, waters and rights from damaging logging operations. The clear cutting of trees is threatening the moose population, the land’s medicinal properties and the destruction of habitats.  

A large section of the presentation discussed what it means to be Treaty People, emphasizing how the existence of every home, business, and even St. Francis Xavier University is possible because of treaty agreements. All Indigenous and Non-Indigenous residents of Treaty Land are Treaty People.  Treaties are grounded in the values of mutual respect, peace and shared responsibility which we as Treaty People should carry with us everyday.  

Dr. Riley Olstead, the professor who teaches Sociology 329, also researches settler colonialism and decolonization. At the event she sparked a thoughtful conversation after the presentation discussing how climate change is what initially inspired her to integrate Indigenous teachings and knowledge into her course.  

She explained how two-eyed seeing, a framework for understanding and problem-solving that combines the strengths of Indigenous ways of knowing with those of Western perspective, allowing both perspectives to guide how we see and act in the world, can offer a more balanced and understanding path to addressing the anxiety that many of us experience regarding climate change and how unsustainable we as a society have been living. 

Dr. Olstead shared that what led her class to focus on Treaty Day in Nova Scotia for their presentation was a part of a “relational invitation for students to step into their place within our binding agreements (to the Peace and Friendship Treaties) and to better understand our relationship to the land.”  

As students, understanding the accountability and obligations we are held to as Treaty People reminds us that reconciliation is not just a national project, but a daily responsibility rooted in respect, learning and action. 

Decolonising Institutions: StFX Observes Truth and Reconciliation Day

On September 30th, 2025, StFX University hosted a ceremony for Truth and Reconciliation day in Mulroney Hall. The event was packed with people from the campus and community attending the ceremony, with a crowd so large it appeared as a sea of orange from above. Orange Shirt Day was recognized in Canada in 2013, a result of activism that sought to raise awareness on Indigenous human rights issues and the legacy of residential schools specifically. Orange Shirt Day was later renamed Truth and Reconciliation Day in 2021, with the ceremonies being held at StFX ever since.  

Savannah Paul, President of StFX’s Indigenous Student Society, opened the event.  After a land acknowledgement she invited Kerry Prosper, StFX’s Elder-in-Residence and the former Chief of Paqtnkek Mi’kmaw Nation. From the StFX website, Elder Prosper ‘'works with StFX students on their projects and subjects that deal with Indigenous issues’’ as well as serves “on anti-racism committees and other campus initiatives”. 

Elder Prosper commenced a smudging ceremony, which involves burning incenses of sacred herbs (such as sage), the smoke of which dispels negative energies from a person’s body and spirit. He explained, “Smudging is a way of preparing ourselves for gatherings or ceremonies, it puts your mind in a good place,” He followed it with a prayer, reminding the audience that we must look out for each other. 

Elder Prosper was followed by Toby Condo, an Indigenous spiritual advisor for correctional services and a sun dancer. He was asked to do a performance for those in attendance. His song echoed loud throughout Mulroney’s halls, and it appeared that the natural lighting coming from the windows brightened in response to his music.  

StFX’s president, Dr. Andy Hakin was invited up to speak. He thanked Elder Prosper and Toby Condo for the moving prayer and song. 

“Today, we come to an event, in the spirit of truth and reconciliation, this ceremony is about responsibility. It is about reflection, and importantly, it’s about ongoing action.” 

Dr. Hakin spoke of action with reconciliation, how it is not enough to simply recognize the past, and how we must also work towards a better future. He spoke to the importance of Truth and Reconciliation Day, about listening and learning, and about reconciling with the country’s dark past.  

“Action, not words” he spoke. 

After Dr. Hakin’s address, Judith Banman Jansen, an Indigenous woman and honours student from the Anthropology department, was invited up to read the Cobra Collins poem “Wild West”. The poem is about Truth and Reconciliation, and a reminder about what happened at the Residential schools in not-so-distant history. 

StFX’s chair of the Faculty Commission on Reconciliation, Dr. Erin Morton, spoke on how we can engage with Truth and Reconciliation and what individual students can do to help. She said that we can start by tracing our own family histories and seeing what side of Canadian history they were on. All Canadians who are not Indigenous come from a family that immigrated during colonisation and understanding when and how they got here can help us put together our history as a whole. 

Kaisan Stevens, an Anthropology student from Eskasoni First Nations, gave a Mi’kmaq perspective on Truth and Reconciliation and spoke of decolonisation in our institutions and daily life.  

The closing speaker, StFX’s Indigenous Student Advisor Cynthia Sewell, read literature on Truth and Reconciliation and provided the attendees with a song to end the ceremony. She gave a history of Truth and Reconciliation Day and invited everyone to participate in the ribbon tying ceremony. 

 The crowd was invited to view the Alan Syliboy and the Thundermakers concert that was happening in the Schwartz Auditorium, a staple event of StFX’s Truth and Reconciliation Day ceremonies. 

Pipers Pub Sparks Wave of Student and Town Solidarity

Early in the morning of September 22, Pipers Pub, a staple in the Antigonish and StFX community, caught fire. Thick black smoke was seen and smelt throughout campus, as fire crews rushed to contain the damage. It has been said to the fire reportedly started in the kitchen, but no further information has been released to the public. But after the initial shock of the event passed, what was more surprising was the absolute support from both students and the community alike.  

Everyone from students to staff to local community members stepped up to show their support. A surge of kind words flooded the Pipers Facebook and Instagram accounts, and the talk around campus focused on one thing - when would Pipers be open again? With Homecoming coming up, one of the biggest events of the semester, it suddenly put into perspective how important Pipers is to StFX and Antigonish as a whole. It also reflects the priorities of the student population. 

It seems like everyone has memories at Pipers, and every weekend a line stretches out the door. It’s natural that the community would want to support the Pub, as shown with the Pipers Pub fundraiser hosed by The Golden X Inn last Saturday. But what makes Pipers Pub such an integral part of StFX? Is it the lack of other options? StFX’s drinking culture? Or is it simply the legacy it holds?  

Who better to answer that question than the students? I asked Jenna, who along with her friends goes to Pipers semi-regularly, “Pipers will be deeply missed. Without the pub open, wing night and other events, especially on Saturday will not be the same”.  After asking some more students around campus, from Piper’s regulars to only special eventgoers, it can easily be said that Pipers provides a unique university experience that no other space in Antigonish does. Live music, frequent theme nights, a night-life atmosphere and a dancefloor to live out the fantasy. Pipers brings an escape from the outside world. And while the other options provide versions of this idea, Pipers executes it.  

But Pipers Pub has the tide on their side. They may have a monopoly within the town, but what truly keeps them afloat is one thing: StFX drinking culture. It is no shocker to any that StFX is known as a party school, and Pipers is the go-to bar in a party town. It’s no wonder the students are flocking there. But is that all?  Is it simply that students need a place to drink together and Pipers provides it? Or is legacy a factor? 

Pipers Pub has been around for decades, and even longer when it used to be the Triangle. Is it the legacy of returning students, or Post grads who pass down memories of Pipers, that turns what would be a simple bar in town into this special place? It is possible. Because Pipers brings in the StFX students, but it also brings in the town. When the fire happened, many, if not majority of voices on social media were from full-time residents of Antigonish and past graduates. It seems StFX and Pipers Pub are linked in their wants. 

Whether it be from Pipers providing the StFX population a place to let loose, or from the allure of memories, Pipers Pub is a staple in Antigonish and StFX’s hearts. Without its doors open, this Homecoming will not be the same. But without the pub, where do students turn? While the priorities of the students and the town are clear, Pipers provides and escape, a place to drink have fun, and contribute to one of the most cannon events at StFX. I reached out to Pipers Pub for their perspective, but I was unable to get a quote from them on the fire and its impact.  Who knew it would take a fire to make a town realize how much a pub means to them! 

Federal Justice Minister Sean Fraser Hosts Q&A at StFX

Canada’s Justice Minister and Attorney General Sean Fraser stopped by StFX last Monday, giving a short lecture during Prof. Adam Lajeunesse’s Public Policy & Governance 101 class. Fraser, a StFX alumn, is the Member of Parliament for Central Nova, which covers all of Pictou County as well as parts of Antigonish County and the Eastern Shore, located north of Halifax.  

The speech started 20 minutes late as Fraser was on the phone with Prime Minister Mark Carney. In the meantime, StFX President Andy Hakin said a few words about StFX’s politics and public policy. ‘’Government is a big entity, and whether you do that or something else, there is a place for a myriad of skills within public service’’, Hakin said to the class. ‘’We’re trying to ensure that our country, through you, goes forward to do the things that are right for the population’’.  

Fraser began with a short introduction, then opened up the floor for a Q&A session. I asked him about the new Hate-Speech bill he announced on September 19. Bill C-9, the Combatting Hate Act, has been criticized by several human right’s watchdogs such as the Canadian Civil Liberties Association.  

The proposed legislation would make it a crime to commit an offence and show a sign or symbol associated with a listed terrorist entity, as well as Nazi Symbols. I asked Fraser if the law was in place 35 years ago, would it have been a crime to protest Apartheid in South Africa with a poster of Nelson Mandela. Mandela was a leader in the African National Congress, which is now widely celebrated for its key role in ending apartheid, yet at the time were proscribed as a terrorist entity.  

Fraser defended the Combatting Hate Act, saying it criminalizes the willful obstruction of “the ability for people to go to a place of worship”.   In addition, it “addresses what’s being treated in the media as a ‘symbols ban’, but there’s more nuance to that’’. Fraser said that it wouldn’t be illegal to raise a Nelson Mandela poster because “the law doesn’t criminalize the display of any symbols, it criminalizes the willful promotion of hate through the use of those symbols’’. Since the willful promotion of hate is already a crime, using a symbol in the exercise of hate would be ‘’an additional layer of criminal responsibility over and above the criminal responsibility for promoting hate against an identifiable group’’.  

When asked about violence against Indigenous women, Fraser replied “In my view, [it’s something] we will need a whole of society effort to overcome centuries of discrimination to a group who’ve been here since time immemorial’’. More broadly, “What justice means more broadly, from my part, I think it’s hard to say that you can address justice vis a vis Indigenous People in Canada if you’re dealing with a community that doesn’t have access to clean water, or affordable housing, or is dealing with overcrowding and the related spread of diseases that may come with it, in addition to whatever challenges you may have on Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women, in addition to what challenges you may have with under policing or over policing, whatever the case may be’’.  

Another student asked about the difference between having Carney as Prime Minister instead of Trudeau. “It doesn’t take a rocket scientist’’, said Fraser, “to figure out that after ten years in office, people want to see new perspectives emerge’’. Under Trudeau, if cabinet ministers wanted to explain “the emotional connection to an issue they or others may have had, they were always given that space. You would be finding yourself occasionally in meetings beyond the scheduled end time because people wanted to air all of their thoughts on the issue, and there’s value in that, but it’s different now’’.   

With Carney, “the meeting starts when the second hand hits the top of the clock... to the extent you have questions, you know what they are, and you’re not just making conversation. It got to a point during one conversation early on where a few colleagues were saying things like ‘I’d like to build on what so and so said, I’d like to echo the argument my colleague made’ and the Prime Minister literally stopped the meeting and said ‘folks, this is a meeting, arguably the most valuable two hours anywhere in Canada this week, and I want you all to know that speaking is for people who have something new or useful to say’. And when you hear that once, you make sure you are not the kind of person who is going to fill time with your thoughts on an issue unless it’s essential to the decision being made”.  

President of the StFX Liberal Society Kash Richards thought “it was a very good talk, he was a very good speaker’’. He met Fraser during the federal election campaign, saying “the impression I got from him... is that what you see is what you get. He’s not putting on a thick mask. He’s there because he cares’’. Richards, a second year English Major, said he’s “always aligned’’ with the Liberal Party. ‘’I’m more of left-wing person, I believe the role of government is to take care of people’’.  

How YOU Can Vote in the Upcoming Federal Election

It is an exciting time in Canadian politics, as the federal election is scheduled to be held Monday, April 28th 2025. Here is how you, yes YOU, specifically, can have your voice be heard and exercise your foundational democratic right to vote.

At minimum you must be a Canadian citizen and at least 18 years of age to vote in any election within Canada.

Voting in the federal election is a little different than voting in a provincial election. In the latest Nova Scotia provincial election, you could vote anywhere in the province ahead of the election date and have your vote count in your home riding. This is not so in the federal election. As noted on the Elections Canada website, you must vote at your assigned polling station.

However, so long as you are able to prove residency in the riding of Cape Breton–Canso–Antigonish (the riding StFX is located in), you can register to vote in this riding for any of this riding’s candidates. You must be able to produce TWO forms of ID to vote in the Cape Breton–Canso–Antigonish riding, one of which must contain your current address within the riding.

Acceptable forms of ID include but are not limited to: A driver’s license or any other official identification issued by a Canadian government (federal, provincial, or municipal), your student ID, a bank statement, a piece of official correspondence from the university about your residency, a utility bill, or a lease or sub-lease. An exhaustive list can be found on the Elections Canada website. Students who live on campus can request a proof of residency letter from the Residence Office.

As confirmed by the university’s President’s Office, there will be advanced polling open April 13th and 18th in the Keating Centre Hospitality Suites from 7am-10:30pm, open to StFX students only. General advanced polling, which will be open to the town as well, are scheduled for April 18th and 21st from 7am-10:30pm in the Bloomfield Mackay Room. Election day polls will also be open in the Bloomfield Mackay Room.

You can also apply to vote by mail. The deadline to apply for mail-in voting is 6pm, April 22nd. Deadlines still apply, so you must take that into account the time it takes for your ballot to reach its destination. You will receive a voting kit and instructions on how to cast your ballot. Once you opt to cast you vote by mail, you will be prohibited from voting in-person, so keep that in mind.

You could cast a special ballot at an Elections Canada office by 6pm on April 22nd. The nearest Elections Canada offices are located at 74 Main Street, Guysborough, NS, and 811 Reeves Street, Port Hawkesbury, NS.

It must be noted that you can only vote in one riding. Voting in any more than a single riding is illegal. The penalty for voter fraud could be up to five years in prison, or a fine of up to $50,000.

StFX Hosts Former Deputy Premier and Current Cape Breton-Canso-Antigonish Federal Conservative Candidate Allan MacMaster for Discussion: Where Are We Going Next in Canada?

For transparency's sake, I am a member of the XPCs.

On Tuesday March 18th, the StFX Political Science Society sponsored an address by former deputy premier and current federal Conservative Party of Canada candidate Allan MacMaster at Mulroney Hall, promoted by the Xaverian Progressive Conservatives. It boasted a full classroom of around 45 attendees including members of the town, county, and student body. The Cape Breton native opened with a speech then transitioned into a question period.

He began by stating that during his time working for the Bank of Montreal, they would look to whether a stock market was being driven by fear or greed. Today, he said, the markets are driven by fear.

MacMaster reiterated worries many Canadians have about the United States' aggressive tariffs threatening to stagnate an economy that is already struggling, but also noted the opportunity that has arisen for us to take a step back and ask ourselves if free trade is really working for the Canadian people in the best way it can.

Early on in his speech he begged the question, does free, globalization of trade always make our lives better? He noted how it leads to cheaper, more disposable goods that negatively impact the environment, not to mention the pocketbooks of those who have to purchase them again and again. Planned obsolescence was a constant theme.

MacMaster emphasized that the growing push to buy local was our chance to create a market reaction that could encourage businesses to start producing in Canada, but that the government has a place in setting the standard. Some interesting ideas that he suggested from a regulation perspective were minimum lifespans for consumer goods, and something like a right to fix your own products, referencing the fact that Samsung stops manufacturing parts for some of its products only a few years after release, forcing you to buy an entirely new product.

However, the former Inverness MLA insisted that localization only works if we produce high quality products. In response to a question on whether it was feasible to bring industry to a relatively unproductive province like Nova Scotia, he acknowledged that investment is crucial to improving productivity. It’s not that Nova Scotian’s are any less hard working, they just aren’t equipped to produce at the same level as their American counterparts.

After taking a question about the future of the economy from a student, MacMaster related it to similar concerns people had in the 80’s when interest rates were upwards of 20%. Eventually things cooled down and the economy got better. His advice for students was this: focus on your studies, get a job you enjoy, start making money and put a little aside if you can. In 5 years, you might be looking at a very different world.

Antigonish Puts Students at Risk of Large Fines with “Nuisance Party By-Law”

Some extra-perceptive students may have noticed receiving a suspiciously vague email prior to this year’s St. Paddy’s day celebrations. This email—sent on behalf of the school—contained all the usual (and often ignored) warnings: don’t hold a street party, keep your celebrations on campus, etc, etc. However, an important note was snuck in amongst these messages, warning students of Antigonish’s “Nuisance Party By-law”—a semi-recent embodiment of the community’s crack-down on student partying culture. This recent edition puts students at large risk of receiving significant fines for partying-related offences. The specific details are outlined below:

On October 11th 2023, a special meeting of the Antigonish town council approved the new “Nuisance Party By-law.” In simple terms, this new by-law gives enforcement officers a substantial amount of power to act against party hosts and party goers, allowing them to hand out offence tickets and large fines to anyone attending a gathering that is considered a “nuisance.”

The by-law outlines the penalties for any offence or failure to comply as “not less than four hundred dollars ($400.00) for a first offence, not less than six hundred ($600.00) for second offence and no less than nine hundred ($900.00) for a third and any subsequent offences.”

The bill defines a “nuisance party” as “a gathering on property which, by reason of the conduct or any one or more of the person(s) in attendance, is characterized by any one or more of the following elements:

a) Public intoxication;

b) The unlawful sale, furnishing, or distribution of alcoholic beverages or other controlled substances;

c) The unauthorized deposit of litter on public or private property;

d) Damage to public or private property;

e) The obstruction of vehicular or pedestrian traffic or interference with the ability to provide emergency services;

f) Sound that is unusual or excessive, or that is likely to be unwanted by disturbing to persons, as described in the Town of Antigonish Noise Control By-Law;

g) Unauthorized open burning as described in the Outdoor Fire By-Law;

h) Public disturbance, including confrontations or violence;

i) Outdoor public urination or defecation; or

j) Use of or entry upon a roof not intended for such occupancy.

To be clear, any gathering that meets even one of these elements will fall under this new by-law. Hosting or attending a so-called “nuisance party” is all the riskier, as enforcement officers have significantly more power than in previous years.

For instance, upon receiving an order to discontinue a party, it is expected that every non-resident leave immediately and for the party to cease. This is outlined in section 5.1 and 5.2 of the by-law. Failure to comply may result in a first offence ticket ($400.00). However, section 5.3 goes on the explain that this order must only be given within a “reasonable amount time” following the violation. This specification means that a party may be classified as a nuisance without the host being made aware for an unspecified amount of time. Under these conditions, it is possible for a person to receive multiple offences without realizing they have already been issued one, resulting in large fines stacking atop each other (up to $600.00, $900.00, or more).

Further complications emerge in section 7.4. This section makes clear that the offence of a nuisance party is attached to the property, not the residents of the property. This creates cause for concern for students, who switch in and out of rental properties every few years. If tenants in the previous year received an order to discontinue a nuisance party, any offences on behalf of the new tenants (within a 2 year timeframe of the original order) would be treated as a subsequent (second, third, etc.) offence, even if it was their first. They would. As a result, be “subject to higher fines.”

It is unclear that the by-law has any large restrictions against the power of enforcement officers. The by-law seems to give the right to act to any officer who believes on “reasonable grounds” that an offence has been committed—which could be as simple as attending a party that has a few stray cans lying around. Even in these circumstances, the party could be considered a “nuisance,” something that is up to the discretion of a singular individual.

Other offences in which a ticket may be given include, but are not limited to: hosting a nuisance party, allowing a nuisance party on their property, failing to leave after having been directed to leave, standing or sitting upon a roof, hanging a poster or banner with “offensive language” in a public place, or “promot[ing] the unsafe consumption of intoxication substances.” The full list can be found in the linked PDF at the bottom of this article.

Whether or not the by-law will be followed in the strictest sense (for example, receiving an offence because there are a few stary cans around the property), remains to be seen. Because the decisions are largely left to the discretion of individual officers, a lack of consistency on what is deemed a nuisance is likely. Rather than a strict guideline outlining how students will be charged for specific acts, the bill acts more like deterrent. Officers may not take all the actions they are permitted through the ambiguous wording of this by-law, but the important part seems to be that they could.

A PDF copy of this by-law is linked here.

An Explosion of Societies: The Result of a Harsh Job Climate

It seems that every year there are more and more societies to take part in during the school year. This may seem strange as there are plenty of societies that fit almost identical niches. From multiple societies focused on respective disciplines such as marketing or engineering, to event-based societies that spend the entirety of the school year counting down to one large event with several fundraisers leading up to it. This is all fine of course; it is even encouraging to routinely see student leadership on campus, as these societies provide great opportunities for students to operate within a functional organization. There does, however, seem to be a case to be made about some societies stepping on other’s toes, so to speak.

I have one theory as to why this may be happening—a theory that is rooted in the conditions of the post-grad world. Today’s workforce demands excellence more than ever before. As sad as it is to see in the formally industrial towns across this province which we call home (at least during the school year) automation and outsourcing have replaced much of Nova Scotia’s—and even Canada’s—manual labour jobs.

If you are uncertain about the validity of the claim that the trades are dying out in Nova Scotia, you need not look further than the recent legislation allowing NSCC, the province’s community college system, to grant degrees. This decision marks a clear move away from the trades.

Throughout my life I have routinely bashed the extreme entrance barriers universities have in place that prevent low-income high school graduates from attending university. However, we must look at what a massive influx in degree holders could look like for the job market. When automation first began, a degree became the way to guarantee a stable income and retirement. Now though, a degree may not be enough. It may even be worth less in the near future. Notably, I want to mention that this problem results solely from the increasing number of degree holders; I fully trust NSCC’s educational capabilities and their ability to compete with Nova Scotia universities. And yes, I am biased as a community college graduate.

So, how does this relate back to societies? What the explosion of societies offers over a degree is a named position to put on a resume, with the position held in the highest regard being that of the society president. With fewer societies, there is less opportunity for students to have the honour of this title on their resume as they enter the workforce post-graduation. But with more societies comes more presidents. An unintended result, however, is the potential for society overlap. Currently, many societies fill similar niches despite being unrelated. And this is all so students can compete in a brutal job market. I do not blame students for doing this at all—these actions are made solely to adapt to our ever-changing world. We are already seeing the results of today’s changing market, and this is even without mentioning other factors like the rise of artificial intelligence or wages that haven’t risen to meet inflation.

If I were to compare this problem to anything we’ve observed before—and bear with me here because this may seem like a stretch—I would compare this to the extinction of the dinosaurs. This may sound absolutely insane, but please hear me out and keep me away from a padded room. After the mass extinction event, in which we are looking at the extinction, or at the very least a decrease in manual labour and entry-level jobs, mammals were met with a very harsh world and greatly diversified in order to survive in a brutally competitive environment. One such occurrence that happened was convergent evolution, where two unrelated species adapted in the same way and filled the same niche. We see the exact same thing in several of StFX’s societies: they are unrelated but fill the same niche. Am I comparing the current competitiveness of the job market to one of the most devastating times in our planet’s history? Yes. Am I also comparing the explosion of student-led societies to that of one of the largest explosions of life and biodiversity in our planet’s history? Also, yes.

As absurd as this comparison may seem, it exemplifies the dire struggle of students entering a workforce in which a degree may not be seen as enough—where four years of school and student loan debt are not enough. When this happens, we adapt as we always have.

The Importance of Charity in Sport

The world of North American professional sports is the world of one of the most profitable industries in the Western world. Star athletes (and State Farm commercials) appear on the nation’s biggest stage, with many signing massive multi-million-dollar contracts funded by the combination of billionaires, ticket sales, lucrative TV deals, and so many sponsors. It may seem like a foregone conclusion that these athletes have an image to keep up, and as a result, stay away from charity donations. But I believe that it runs deeper than that. The move to support charities isn’t just a public relations move but a value ingrained into the very fabric of sport. With sport, there must be sportsmanship, and charity is the ultimate form of that.

The inspiration for this article came from the recent Pucks for Purpose hockey games, an excellent display of student leadership, charitable community efforts, corporate sponsorships, event planning, and entertainment. Even though AUS athletes do not have the wealth present in professional sports leagues, their participation in the event brought about the perfect marriage of charity and sport. More importantly, these games show that charity can flourish regardless of the level of funding. No matter how much wealth a person does or does not have, sportsmanship is founded on respect for peers in the sport. It isn’t hard to see how that can be extended to respect for the community and viewing us as all on the same team.

One of my personal favourite charitable organizations run by an athlete is Craig’s Closet, run by the Pittsburgh Steelers' Cam Heyward. Cam, being the recipient of the 2023 Walter Payton Man of the Year award—an honour bestowed upon the most charitable NFL player of the season—named this organization after his late father who could not afford a proper fitting suit growing up. The organization allows young men to have formal attire that they would otherwise not be able to afford.

My own experience working at Tip Top Tailors makes this specific charity dear to me. While working there, I saw young and older men alike struggle to afford formal attire for events. The young men stick out to me particularly clearly, as the Cape Breton Regional Municipality (my home county) has one of the highest child poverty rates in all of Nova Scotia. It was always difficult to see a mother come in for her son’s prom and not be able to afford a suit because so many other expenses needed to be covered just to survive. Seeing an athlete, with who knows how much money between contracts, various sponsorships, and other business ventures, be recognized for his charity directly addressing a problem that hit so close to home for me made me and the struggles I witnessed daily feel seen.

With this, I cannot stress enough how impressed I am—and how impressed the rest of the student body should be—with an event like Pucks for Purpose. Going beyond sport, it is an amazing charity project that takes an insane amount of coordination to pull off successfully. And the respect that sportsmanship brings through something like this, even though I can’t even ice skate, reminds us that we are all part of one team in our small, college town community.

Craft Breweries, Cafes, and Antigonish’s Third Spaces

With the advent that was the smartphone back when most of us were just toddlers, there came into existence a new pastime: scrolling. I’m guilty of it, and don’t tell me you aren’t guilty of it—everyone and their grandmother is guilty of it. After hours of Instagram Reels and TikToks, we have that same sinking feeling as drinking on a Monday night. You may ask yourself: “did I really just do that?” before coming to terms with your lost hours. With the rise of technology and passing the time through endless scrolling, we often find ourselves needing excuses to get out of the house. This is where the third space comes in.

A third space is a place away from our traditional first two spaces, those being home and work/school. This is a place in which we can be present with our friends and acquaintances without the comforts and distractions of home but with new comforts and distractions of social interaction. It’s not news that humans are social creatures. Indeed, left alone on a deserted island and we may even start talking to volleyballs to keep us company. But by having a spot to catch up with friends and maybe do some schoolwork off campus, we revitalize ourselves with a necessary de-stressor. Antigonish has two clear favourite forms of third spaces: craft breweries and cafes.

Craft breweries often make great event spaces. Lively evenings with local musicians playing their hearts out always make for a great night out with friends. While I do love our own Inn, there is something a bit more quaint and rustic to a night out at Candid or Oak Manor, and playing trivia against the locals rather than just other students is always a treat. It is obvious that other students feel the same way given the number of events held by different societies at these breweries. Often the connection between the students and these breweries runs deeper than just enjoying their beer and a nice night out on the town. These breweries offer amazing job opportunities to students, and it’s hard to visit one without seeing a fellow student working the tap. The best part is that you don’t even have to drink when you go to these places if you don’t want to. You can simply enjoy the vibe, but just don’t be too surprised if one of your friends has had a little too much and needs to be walked home later that night.

Cafes are on the quieter side compared to breweries and provide great opportunities to work on assignments and fill up on caffeine. Places such as the Grindhouse and Tall and Small offer different brews that are great for a little afternoon pick-me-up. The sandwich selection at both places is only another bonus. I recently had just gone to Tall and Small with a group to discuss the game plan for a group assignment. It was a lovely relaxing atmosphere, and quiet enough to discuss the plan without any voices being drowned out.

If you need some time away from your phone and all the various apps designed to distract you, I highly recommend finding yourself a third space. I’d also recommend enjoying a local place and rewarding them with your patronage. As much as we all enjoy our campus’ Starbucks, it is important to support local when we can.

Beyond Business: Why Every Student Should Attend the Women in Business Conference

On March 8th, I attended the 10th annual Women in Business (WIB) Conference, an event dedicated to celebrating leadership, empowerment, and networking among women in various industries. As an English major, I wasn’t sure what to expect. However, I found the experience incredibly inspiring, engaging, and insightful. The theme of this year’s conference, “Leading a Legacy: A Decade of Empowerment,” reflected not only the impressive ten-year milestone of the WIB Conference but also the long-lasting impact of inspiring women from StFX returning to celebrate.

The weekend began with a kickoff event at Candid, where students had the chance to connect, hear from alumni, and listen to keynote speaker Kathleen Sheridan. The evening ended on a high-energy note, leaving everyone excited for the next day’s events. The following day was filled with learning opportunities, starting with two engaging workshops led by Ambrosia Caplice and Myrna L. Gillis, where attendees learned about their personal experiences, advice, and essential skills for professional and personal growth. In the afternoon, the Generations Panel provided an opportunity for students to hear from alumni and ask questions about their journeys—both the challenges they faced and the successes they achieved in their respective industries. To close out the weekend, the impressive Dr. Beth McCharles and Nikki Doucet spoke as the gala keynote speakers, sharing their experiences as powerful businesswomen navigating the typically male-dominated sports industry. Overall, it was a weekend filled with empowering and diverse perspectives. During the conference, I had the chance to speak with one of the WIB Conference Directors, Erica Cameron, who shared that this milestone event had been in the works for nearly a year. The whole WIB team’s dedication resulted in a remarkable turnout—over 45 alumni and more than 100 student delegates participated in the event.

From my perspective as an English major, I found the conference especially eye-opening. While the business world might not be my primary field of study, the themes of leadership, perseverance, and professional development are relevant and applicable to any career. Listening to women who have built successful careers in male-dominated industries gave me valuable insights into the resilience and adaptability required to thrive in any profession. Hearing their personal stories, lessons learned, and advice for the future was both motivating and reassuring. As Erica reaffirmed, “Although the conference is run by WIB, our key values are to inspire leadership, empowerment, and networking—applicable to anyone.” The conference was an experience to learn more about the business world but also an event that reinforced that no matter what career path one chooses, the ability to be a leader, form connections and take risks is essential. I left the conference feeling empowered, and now, I encourage anyone who, like me, is a woman (not) in business to step out of their comfort zone and attend events like the WIB conference—you never know what could happen.

Antigonish Recreation: An Escape from Campus Life

As winter’s final chills give way to the anticipation of spring, and exams quickly approaching, now is the perfect time to explore the range of recreational opportunities available in Antigonish.

Despite the wealth of options the town offers, many students and residents may be unaware of the local exercise opportunities at their disposal. These include equipment loan programs, scenic hiking trails, and must-see historic landmarks.

Antigonish County Recreation offers an extensive equipment loan program that breaks down the barriers of cost and accessibility. The initiative is intended to enhance opportunities for fun and healthy activities for individuals of all abilities, ensuring everyone has access to the resources needed to stay active and engaged. The program offers a variety of equipment, including ice skates and helmets, “community bags” stocked with skipping ropes, balls, scoops, pylons, and hula hoops, as well as bikes, scooters and helmets in various sizes. Once the warmer weather arrives, additional equipment such as stand-up paddleboards, and adaptive canoe equipment will also become available. For university students facing the pressures of the upcoming exam period, perhaps the most appealing options are the outdoor lawn games. The collection includes spike ball, bocce ball, washer toss, horseshoes, and bean bag toss – perfect for relieving stress and enjoying some fresh air between study sessions.

Antigonish and surrounding areas are also home to many beautiful hiking and biking trails. Just a 15-minute walk from campus is the Antigonish Landing trail, a 4-km round-trip hike along an estuary of Antigonish Harbour, complete with two elevated platforms offering unobstructed views of ospreys, eagles, and ducks. For those willing to venture a bit farther, Beaver Mountain Provincial Park, Brown’s Mountain, and Fairmont Ridge Hiking Trail are all excellent spots to immerse yourself in nature and explore some of the area’s most scenic landscapes.

If you find yourself drawn to historic landmarks, the Cape George Lighthouse is a must-see. Situated 1000 feet above St. George’s Bay, it offers a panoramic view that stretches to Prince Edward Island, and Cape Breton on clear days. The Arisaig Lighthouse, overlooking the Northumberland Strait, provides a similar appeal.

Whether you are seeking outdoor adventure, a peaceful retreat in nature, or a chance to explore the must-see landmarks within the community, Antigonish and its surroundings offer a wealth of opportunities to suit all interests. With so much to explore right at your doorstep, it's clear that Antigonish is a place where residents and visitors can enjoy both the beauty of nature and the vibrancy of community life. So, get out, explore, and take full advantage of everything Antigonish has to offer—because the best experiences are just one adventure away!

For more information on the Equipment Loan Program, contact Antigonish County Recreation by email at recreation@antigonishcounty.ca, call (902) 863-1141 or visit their website at: https://recreation.antigonishcounty.ca/equipment-loan-accessibility-loan-program/

Probe: Starbucks Whistleblower Reveals Increasingly Long Drink Orders Actually an Attempt to Trick Patrons into Summoning Ghargatuloth, Demon Prince of Tzeench into Reality.

We really should have seen this coming…..

In the wake of the enormous multi-headed demon currently wreaking havoc on campus, a whistleblower who will remain anonymous approached the Xaverian Weekly claiming to have information on its origins. 

Huddled by a window on the third floor of the library, struggling to maintain our balance as the tremors from the avian-headed Forger of Hells pummeling Mulroney building into oblivion with everyone inside shook the ground, she began to explain.

“So basically, we don’t make any coffee at Starbucks” she shouted over the noise. “The elaborate names of our drinks are actually spells, and when a customer riddles off each magic word in perfect succession, the drink is summoned from the great beyond to an area just out of his or her sight. We just grab it and hand it to them.” 

A small crack formed in the ceiling above us through which an ancient dust billowed, but for the sake of journalism I continued the interview. 

“Have you ever had the person working the counter ‘mishear your order?’ That just means your spell was weak and it failed to summon anything. Have you ever got the wrong order? Guess what, you must have mispronounced your Latin at the counter.”

“Eventually, the goal was to keep increasing the number of magic words required per order until one fateful student was skilled enough to cast the spell that summoned the Prince of a Thousand Faces, and it looks like that finally happened.”

At this point, the structural integrity of the library was failing, and chunks of concrete began to fall. Seeing as this was the case, we pushed over some terrified first years who looked to us for salvation but were ultimately in our way, and bolted for the doors. 

Regrouping, we dusted ourselves off in the atrium at the top of the science building, affording us a view of the colloquially named God of the Last Hunt just in time for him to sunder the library in two, destroying all life within. 

“I’m not sure how people never picked up on what was going on” our informant continued. “They are literally chanting Latin-esque words in quick succession to get their drink. Why else would the sizes be in Italian? We’re in Canada.” 

After writing down all she said I quickly wrapped up the interview and made my way to my car, which was luckily one of a few not crushed by flying debris. Unfortunately, however, I had forgotten that I’d spent my last $15 ordering a small water from Starbucks and wasn’t able to fill up on gas. I then got out of my car and ran to the safest place I could think of: the catacombs beneath St. Ninian’s Cathedral. Imagine my shock as I managed to barely escape them with my life after seeing what they beheld. Clothes tattered and mind fuzzied, I somehow was able to stumble my way to McDonald’s where for the price of a crisp high five and some pocket lint I procured an extra-large coffee, and was able to regain my senses.

As of now, Father Donald and Father Danny’s excommunication effort has seen minimal progress. Some on campus have suggested reforming the Sisters of St. Martha to reinforce our Chaplains, and there have even been murmurs of utilizing the nuclear option and calling Father Stan out of retirement to banish this Malignant Entity. However, critics argue that harnessing his spiritual power may result in the destruction of all known life, which could be seen as counterproductive. 

For updates on this situation, stay tuned in to the Xaverian Weekly.

The Curse of the Whale Bone

Every university has its share of weird superstitions, from rubbing John Harvard's feet, Penn State Ninny lion curse, to the University of Toronto's “King College Circle.” Yet somehow StFX has made things ten times weirder. Being located in a province with strong ties to the sea, whaling, and maritime history, students have often brought in a treasure trove of goods—sometimes for the worst.

Let me be your guide as we dive into a story as old as the ancient bricks of MacIssac Hall. Long before StFX stood as it does today, the shores of Nova Scotia were home to whalers who braved the restless Atlantic. One stormy night, as legend tells, a monstrous whale larger than any seen before washed up on the rocks near Antigonish, its body battered but its massive jawbone intact. The fishermen who found it dared not touch it, for the beast bore strange markings along its ribs as if carved by unseen hands. Among the trembles of his colleagues, one read aloud “BurMac4Evr.” The bone was taken to the university as a curiosity, a relic of the sea's power. But elders warned that the whale did not die naturally–that it had been cursed by the deep. Ever since its towering jawbone has stood on campus (except for that one incident, then later returned in 2017), a silent guardian of those who respect it and a harbinger of misfortune for those who do not.

Yet the tale doesn't stop here. Years later on the shores of Antigonish, a group of daring first year students, defiant of superstition laughed in the face of the infamous whalebone curse. On a crisp autumn night under the glow of the campus lamp posts, they linked arms and boldly marched through the towering jawbone, swearing that the legend was nothing but a myth. But as weeks passed their luck turned sour, failed exams, lost papers, and inexplicable misfortunes plagued them. One even swore that he was haunted by the ghostly moan of the ill-fated whale in his residence building.

Alas nobody believed him, not even his roommate. Another student pleaded to her CAs and even though they were obliged to listen they dismissed her nonsense and reported her to Res-Life. In an attempt to ease their worries, the students went to the Keating Centre to watch a hockey game. All was well until their classmates enthusiastically yelled what was called the “WHALEBONE CHANT.” Panicked and out of options the students flew out the doors and sought the wisdom of the oldest professor they could think of–Ed Carty. “Yes!” they exclaimed. “Surely he’ll know what to do.” He chuckled and said "Quaedam maledictiones non puniunt nisi ludibrio" (translated by more fortunate souls “Some curses don't punish until they are mocked”). If only they hadn't flunked his Latin midterm. “Curse you whalebone!” they said shaking their tiny first year fists. From that day forward students whisper the warning: walk through the whalebone and StFX may never let you leave.

Mark Carney Declares All Government Employees Must Delete Starbucks App From Their Phones

In the pursuit of economic austerity policies, Prime Minister Mark Carney declares that all government ministers must reduce their extraneous spending.

“Every penny counts, and if you think I shouldn’t talk to you before you had your coffee, just wait until you see me,” said the former Harvard hockey player. This comes after Carney cutting the Carbon Tax, which he has described in previous interviews as “divisive and unnecessary.”

This tax policy decision has blown over quite well with the majority of the Canadian citizens, but this most recent policy announcement has received some blow back from government employees. “This is, like, crazy,” said Bethany Smith, a low-level bureaucrat. “How else am I going to be able to skip the line in the morning? Does he expect me to wait like I’m, like, poor or something?”

Kyle Brown, Brittney’s jobless boyfriend who must accompany her to work so that their apartment’s drywall might remain intact, had this to say. “Like… uh… it blows for real, like for sure. Baby, can we go? I think it's weird you even replied to him when he talked to you. Give me your phone.”

This is but one one many people who have expressed concern. On an internet poll conducted by the Xaverian Weekly’s data analytics division, it was noticed that lower level Liberal Party bureaucrats accounted for 40% of the revenue garnered by Ottawa area Starbucks’, despite making up only 8% of the city’s youth population. Conversely, Conservative Party staffers tended to either have their live-in maids make it for them so that they could bring it to the office with them. The few NDP-land “castmembers” which responded/survived the election declared that they did not drink coffee, due to the beverage’s colonial history.

“It really makes you wonder how Carney will fare as a leader if he is reelected,” one artist-formerly-known-as-Twitter user commented. “If he’s willing to put the lower echelons of his own party under the knife like this, it makes you wonder how much he will support low-income Canadians.”

Leader of the NDP Jagmeet Singh had this to say regarding the announcement. “I’m just wondering how Mr. Carney thinks this will help the unionization efforts of Starbucks employees across the country. I mean, there’s not even a Minister of Labour to preemptively send them forced arbitration, while the NDP does nothing about the issue. I might actually have to advocate for the working-class, God forbid!”

The Xaverian reached out to Carney for comment, but a carrier-pigeon, which arrived two weeks after the original request, delivered a note which stated that the phonelines and electric-lights in Parliament were being removed as a cost saving measure.

BREAKING: Piper's Pub Statue Revealed to Be StFX President Andy Hakin During Brief but Iconic Scottish Modelling Career

ANTIGONISH, NS — A secret dossier obtained by The Xaverian Weekly shows that the towering bagpiper statue perched atop Piper’s Pub is none other than St.FX President Andy Hakin, captured during what’s now recognized as his “bloody successful” Scottish modeling career in the 80s.

“I always thought there was something oddly presidential about that statue,” said Piper’s bartender Sheila MacDonald, a longtime Piper’s bartender who insists she once heard the statue mutter, “Budget cuts are coming,” after the last call.“It’s like it’s saying, ‘Welcome to Piper’s, I just signed a memo.’”

Leaked photographs from the Kilt Life Quarterly archives confirm that a young Hakin graced multiple covers in the early 1990s under monikers like “The Brave Heartthrob,” and “Clad in Plaid.” One image shows Hakin sporting a majestic tartan, bagpipe in hand, eyes fixed on some distant horizon—presumably envisioning the glorious future of Nova Scotian higher education.

“Look at the statue’s face! That’s not just stoicism; it’s sheer administrative bravado,” commented local sculptor Hamish MacFadden. “He’s piping not just for Country Night, but for an entire institution,” MacFadden added, dabbing away a solitary, patriotic tear before giving a reverent salute.

When confronted with the images, President Hakin was walking through Coady Gardens, suspiciously decked out in full Highland regalia, and attempted to deny everything.“I’m just a normal, everyday professor type,” he said, clearing his throat and clutching his bagpipes like a kid caught sneaking cookies. “I don’t know how to pose… or pipe. That would be ridiculous.”

His denial quickly unraveled when a sudden gust of wind pried a magazine out of his satchel, revealing a glossy 1992 Bagpipe & Barrel Digest centerfold of Hakin in mid-twirl. Eyewitnesses claim he blushed and muttered under his breath, “Aye, the rumors are true.”

Moira MacMorran, an Antigonish tourism coordinator, practically glowed at the news: “This is the perfect brand synergy,” she said, come for the kilt, stay for the man!” she beamed, before humming what sounded suspiciously like Scotland the Brave.

Over at Piper’s, bar manager John MacDonald says they’re going all-in. “We’re launching ‘Hakin Heritage Night,’ featuring non-stop bagpipes, a new ‘Haggis Poutine Supreme,’ and a house cocktail called The Academic Advisor,” he explained, vigorously stirring a questionable liquid into a coffee mug. “It’s neat Scotch, but in a mug—so you can pretend you’re in a very serious meeting about campus wifi.”

As the shockwaves ripple through town, folks wonder: Does the statue stay? Should it go? Students like Fiona MacDonald vehemently oppose its removal. “We cannot remove the statue,” insisted Fiona, a first-year student who claims the sight of the stoic bagpiper is the only thing that motivates her to attend morning lectures. “It’s like a glorious stone sentinel smizing in a woolen skirt.” [here, smizing refers to smiling with your eyes]

Opponents argue that if it is indeed President Hakin, maybe the man should pony up for statue maintenance. But for now, the bagpiper remains perched atop Piper’s Pub, eyeing passersby as though reminding them that life’s too short to park without a price-gouged parking pass. 

If there’s one thing Antigonish has learned from this twist, it’s that behind every stern university email is a story of bagpipe pageantry. You simply cannot keep a determined Scot from bagpiping his way to glory, be it in a university President’s office or perched triumphantly on top of Piper’s Pub.

Town of Antigonish Reveals Clock Tower in Town Hall Actually Contains an Experimental and Volatile Anti-Air Defense System

In a press conference surrounding the economic impacts of the Trump tariffs, mayor Sean Cameron has revealed important details surrounding the implementation of the system.

“All of us on the Town Council thought it was very important for one of the bastions of Nova Scotian industry to have adequate defense capabilities during this very uncertain time,” Cameron said. “We have been in contact with Rheinmetall for quite some time, and we hope to continue this valuable working relationship in the future,” he continued.

Rheinmetall is one of Europe’s leading weapons manufacturers and is based out of Germany. No word was given regarding how Germany’s increased defense budget will affect the availability of missiles and rockets in Antigonish. Cameron went on to add that he welcomed dialogue between the United States and the town, so long as “the dialogue starts and ends with incredible acts of copious violence.”

Deputy Mayor Diane Roberts added a few comments at the end of the conference. “We can’t let those treacherous American apes take our land. It is time to show them and the world exactly what kind of damage our town can do to those that step to us. We’re King Von’s true disciples, no cap.”

Reactions from the townspeople have been mixed. Most have been in favour of the defense capabilities, but some wish the town would go one step further. “Preemptive strike is the way to go, for sure,” said one StFX philosophy professor. “It’s what Aristotle would do, and we really need to throw the table at them.” He began to say something else, but was chased away by wild coyotes before he could begin. One StFX student thinks the town should take the opposite approach. “Why don’t we all just chill out and smoke a little hash? I found a new couch to put beside my front porch, we could do it there.”

Another important figure also has thoughts on the matter. StFX President Andy Hakin has responded to the press-conference by stating that he would not have allocated so much of StFX’s monetary resources to the university’s own defense budget. “This seems like kind of a blindside,” Hakin stated. “We had always agreed there would be parity between the town’s and university’s defense spending, so now the university will need to increase its own spending so as to not break the agreement.” Hakin declared that funds formerly dedicated to stocking Kevin’s Corner, the university food-kitchen, would need to be reallocated. “Why do we even have a food-kitchen? Doesn’t that just encourage the poors to remain poor?” he said, wringing his hands with maniacal glee. Hakin refused to comment on Cameron’s suggestion that Schmidt-Cassegrain Telescope (SCT) found in the StFX Observatory be repurposed as a space-laser.

Breaking: Fanfiction Featuring Former Prime Minister Brian Mulroney and Quote: “Best Friends” Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher Found Among Mulroney’s Personal Effects

Over the last year, a team made up of faculty from StFX’s little known archeology department has been meticulously combing through new evidence found after a minor windstorm knocked out the power for the entirety of northern Nova Scotia. This was accompanied by a slight tremor, and due to the “pragmatic” design philosophy of Mulroney building, caused several load bearing walls to collapse. Luckily for those interested in Canadian political history, albeit less so for the 48 students and staff crushed to death by the falling debris, a smaller wall on the 5th floor also collapsed, revealing a mysterious crypt, previously uncaptured by the inquisitive eyes of the public.

After weeks of excavating only revealed such trivialities as the former Prime Minister’s detailed list of investments in Mexican auto manufacturing and a full-sized poster of Quebec with a large “X” drawn over it, archeologists began to lose hope for any kind of meaningful discovery.

However, in their hour of greatest need, one plucky professor finally stumbled upon something of significance, a notebook labelled “Brian’s Diary (DON’T TOUCH!!!)” The diary appeared to contain plausibly true stories in which Ronald Reagan, Margaret Thatcher, and Brian Mulroney were the protagonists.

“Everyone said we were like three peas in a pod” was the opening line, read to us by Dr. Doug Diggemup, the professor who located the notebook.

Passages included adventures both whimsical and fantastic, but of which some may be criticized for what are colloquially known as “mary-sueisms.” A good many references to the strength of the three world leaders’ friendship were made across the diary. One excerpt read that the trio were:

“(L)ike Holmes and Watson and Lestrade.”

Literature experts from StFX’s English department have determined from context that Mulroney was referring to himself as Lestrade.

An excerpt describing the three of them working together at the United Nations read:

“We were a classic trio, like Bonnie and Clyde and Doug, and Doug was maybe even more important than Bonnie because he was the one taking all the pictures.”

Interestingly, several passages in the notebook look as if to be describing instances of slights Mulroney feels to have suffered at the hands of the other two, but what appears to be residue from dried tears renders these pages illegible. The words “birthday” and “forgot” are solely identifiable, but purely because of their frequency of use.

The implications of this notebook on Canadian political history may be dubious, but Dr. Diggemup is certain that within these pages lie the key to finally making Quebec “take the hint” and go away.